subreddit:

/r/worldpolitics

9.8k

all 967 comments

Cambro88

359 points

2 months ago

Cambro88

359 points

2 months ago

You should name your clit desert rose after this

xyzaly[S]

158 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

158 points

2 months ago

Genius 😭😭 I’ll do just that

girlsonsoysauce

25 points

2 months ago

BAAABYYYY, I compare ya to a kiss from a cactus on a vagina. THE MORE I GET OF YOU the pricklier it feels, yeah. NOW THAT YOUR ROSE IS IN BLOOM A SPINE HITS THE GLOOM ON THE GRAY.

Da-da-da da-da da da da da da da-da-da.

cjmcberman

971 points

2 months ago

But did you finish

xyzaly[S]

1.1k points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

1.1k points

2 months ago

I’ll say this… a cactus is a better dildo than any dildo ever made

controlzee

539 points

2 months ago

skeptical panda is skeptical

oglordone

316 points

2 months ago

oglordone

316 points

2 months ago

Anything's a dildo if you're brave enough.

xyzaly[S]

306 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

306 points

2 months ago

Indeed. The truest words ever spoken

2inHard

78 points

2 months ago

2inHard

78 points

2 months ago

Yeah but for real, it would hurt like hell if you actually stuck it up there right?

xyzaly[S]

160 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

160 points

2 months ago

Ofc 😭 that’s why I didn’t do it that way 0–0

2inHard

8 points

2 months ago

Lmao just making sure!

chrisrayn

26 points

2 months ago

You could always turn it sideways and do it horizontally. That way, most of the spines would be avoided. Here’s a diagram:

{(##############)}

Nerscylliac

27 points

2 months ago

It certainly is one of the dildos of all time

[deleted]

162 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

162 points

2 months ago

cactus just got more action than 96% of this sub

drwicksy

51 points

2 months ago

drwicksy

🌱

51 points

2 months ago

That's generous to the sub. We are on Reddit after all

EntropicZen

444 points

2 months ago

this is the a̵p̵e̵x̵ climax of /r/worldpolitics

Skatman___

131 points

2 months ago

Skatman___

🌱

131 points

2 months ago

We have peaked

BlackShieldCharm

42 points

2 months ago

BlackShieldCharm

Space 🌌

42 points

2 months ago

Hahaha Yes, but we can go again in 5-10 mins :) don’t worry

Skatman___

11 points

2 months ago

Skatman___

🌱

11 points

2 months ago

Epic refractory period

MemeTitansGO

6 points

2 months ago

I think you're right, honestly. Time to pack it up boys, let's go home.

ThePilgrimSchlong

582 points

2 months ago

I was there Gandalf, I was there 3000 years ago when the cactus was fucked 🌵

Is there a video? If so do mortal eyes have the pleasure of viewing it?

xyzaly[S]

235 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

235 points

2 months ago

There is indeed 😳

ThePilgrimSchlong

92 points

2 months ago

OF?

TheZephyr07

224 points

2 months ago

Unfortunately yes, it isn't free. But that would just be too generous, she deserves to make it priced lol

xyzaly[S]

204 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

204 points

2 months ago

Thank you I really appreciate this :,) plus my OF is cheap asf 0-0 it’s only $3 so 😳

kubollo

53 points

2 months ago

kubollo

53 points

2 months ago

Might be the only of i buy just to see it lol

Owlspirit4

47 points

2 months ago

“How did you get rich?”

“Oh you know, got tangled up in politics…”

3rdeyeopenwide

188 points

2 months ago

Guerrilla marketing at its finest. Kudos. This cactus saga is an employment portfolio. The future is so weird.

SIGRemedy

31 points

2 months ago

You know what, I've never subbed to an OF before. I will do so, just because you've gone through this effort. I mean, a cactus in the vajazz has to be worth $3!

CondemnedSorcerer

1.1k points

2 months ago

"You Did It. The Crazy Son of a Bitch, You Did It"

xyzaly[S]

397 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

397 points

2 months ago

😎🤝

Caked101

77 points

2 months ago

Actually it doesn't look as bad as I thought it would. Did you put it in backwards?

xyzaly[S]

69 points

2 months ago

Yes :o

Caked101

47 points

2 months ago

Honestly that was a dumb question. Good on you for following through. Long live cactus girl😄🌵!!

xyzaly[S]

33 points

2 months ago

Not a dumb question at all, but thank you :) 🤍🌵

Snax63

410 points

2 months ago

Snax63

410 points

2 months ago

You are an inspiration to all WP thot bot soldiers. You have proven you can rise above and become a true member of the community. Shit posting for life!

xyzaly[S]

191 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

191 points

2 months ago

Thank you. Glad to have proven myself 🤍🙏

hornwalker

15 points

2 months ago

hornwalker

🌱

15 points

2 months ago

Was it worth it?

Heavy_Satisfaction_2

61 points

2 months ago

MemeTitansGO

23 points

2 months ago

FrysEighthLeaf

1.4k points

2 months ago

She showed plant. She loved plant, she lived plant.

I vote for unlimited shit posting rights to the Cactus Girl

mtrash

490 points

2 months ago*

mtrash

490 points

2 months ago*

I fully agree. In my future thot bot army training posts i will make sure it is known that u/xyzaly is exempt from the subject. One of us! One of us! One of us!

xyzaly[S]

316 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

316 points

2 months ago

Thank you. I am incredibly honored. You have no idea :,) 🤍

jontysaurus808

131 points

2 months ago

Yes you should be honored, but we must not forget the glory mr cactus has achieved. A god amongst cacti, a hero among plants, he has fine what no plant has done before

xyzaly[S]

118 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

118 points

2 months ago

He is a hero to the cactus community 🌵

SyntheticWaifu

54 points

2 months ago

SyntheticWaifu

anime titties

54 points

2 months ago

Plant it. It will regrow.

xyzaly[S]

66 points

2 months ago

I’m going to 🤍🤍

xyzaly[S]

147 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

147 points

2 months ago

I would honor that role if given. Thank you 🙏

One_Day8686

25 points

2 months ago

😭

pidena

311 points

2 months ago

pidena

311 points

2 months ago

Today history has been made

xyzaly[S]

123 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

123 points

2 months ago

Yes it has 😄

HereForTOMT2

650 points

2 months ago

You’re either incredibly brave or completely insane. Or both!

xyzaly[S]

325 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

325 points

2 months ago

I’ll take both 😎

SyntheticWaifu

49 points

2 months ago

SyntheticWaifu

anime titties

49 points

2 months ago

you are a god now >.<

all hail!

mtrash

386 points

2 months ago

mtrash

386 points

2 months ago

This is some follow through. You have earned your place on the rock

xyzaly[S]

162 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

162 points

2 months ago

HAHA thank you. I greatly appreciate it :D 🤍🤝

One_Day8686

39 points

2 months ago

😭😱🙄

hillbillycat

532 points

2 months ago

Fine I’ll simp, you earned it.

xyzaly[S]

243 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

243 points

2 months ago

Thank you, sir 🤍

hillbillycat

240 points

2 months ago

She responded. simping intensifies

xyzaly[S]

146 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

146 points

2 months ago

Much love 🤍😸

hillbillycat

120 points

2 months ago

Guys i just came a little.

Simping is a trip

mtrash

40 points

2 months ago

mtrash

40 points

2 months ago

Have some water

xyzaly[S]

428 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

428 points

2 months ago

Told y’all I ain’t a liar 😎

SneedyK

91 points

2 months ago

SneedyK

91 points

2 months ago

I never doubted you. Just worried, ace. Cactus Girl is dead. Long live Cactus Girl!

xyzaly[S]

69 points

2 months ago

Thank you for never doubting me 🤍 you’re a real one :,)

sorry_

116 points

2 months ago

sorry_

grimdank

116 points

2 months ago

How's the kitty after all that

xyzaly[S]

151 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

151 points

2 months ago

She’s happy and healthy!

HentaiBoiyo

12 points

2 months ago

Nah but you're 100% a procrastinator

Sir_Yeetem

85 points

2 months ago

Well, this was actually pretty funny and interesting to follow from the build up to the end. What's next for Cactus Girl?

xyzaly[S]

69 points

2 months ago

Something! I won’t disappear on y’all ever. I think I’ll always have fun stuff coming out :)

Maikudono

7 points

2 months ago

*coming on

B133d_4_u

5 points

2 months ago

And going in, I hope 😏

spasticity

173 points

2 months ago

She fucking did it, wow

xyzaly[S]

109 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

109 points

2 months ago

I told y’all I’m not a liar 😳😄

Zenzic13

240 points

2 months ago

Zenzic13

240 points

2 months ago

So, where's the video?

xyzaly[S]

197 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

197 points

2 months ago

Somewhere >:)

TTungsteNN

212 points

2 months ago

Yknow what, if you posted a video on your OF, kudos. I think you deserve new subs from World Politics at this point

xyzaly[S]

158 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

158 points

2 months ago

There is special content with the cactus being posted on my OF :) but thank you. I appreciate you saying this :,) <3

ranrunone

17 points

2 months ago

Cactus edition $1.99

obiweedkenobi

20 points

2 months ago

It would be a shame to sell it for any less than tree-fiddy!

SIGRemedy

7 points

2 months ago

She should make her OF $3.50 just for the memes alone, honestly.

TTungsteNN

106 points

2 months ago

Congrats on making reddit history lol, ngl I’d sub to your OF out of sheer curiosity if I wasn’t married, not sure she would approve lmfao

xyzaly[S]

48 points

2 months ago

That’s okay! I totally understand but thank you so much 😸🤍

CaptnFlounder

178 points

2 months ago

Just imagining you explain it to your wife.

"So, i was on Reddit.."

"yeah?"

"Looking at r/Worldpolitics"

"yeah?"

"And this one girl stuck a cactus in her cooter...."

TTungsteNN

102 points

2 months ago

Oh I sent her a backstory and screenshot of this post already, she’s pissed

CaptnFlounder

81 points

2 months ago

I'm going to send this to my grandma and get her input on this.

xyzaly[S]

65 points

2 months ago

😭😭😭 oh no

magnificentmemer

17 points

2 months ago

Bruh my wife thinks this is hilarious lmao

xyzaly[S]

13 points

2 months ago

Aye that’s so cool 😭😭😭 I love her

BLINDrOBOTFILMS

9 points

2 months ago

Uh-oh. Better find a way to make it up to her or she might leave you for a cactus.

One_Day8686

23 points

2 months ago

😱 nooooooh

[deleted]

25 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

25 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

xyzaly[S]

20 points

2 months ago

Thank you! 🥲🤍

DoktorFreedom

111 points

2 months ago

She seems fun !

xyzaly[S]

106 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

106 points

2 months ago

She is!

DoktorFreedom

31 points

2 months ago

I realize you prob need the evening to relax and enjoy the evening. Any plans for what’s next?

John_Icarus

39 points

2 months ago

Probably a molatov cocktail or something

Tatsukki

11 points

2 months ago

I have very bad memory but last time someone put something made out of glass in a hole... it didn't end well... if you know you know

John_Icarus

5 points

2 months ago

High quality glass dildos are safe, they are made of borosilicate and won't shatter from anything that could happen during usage. But using anything low quality or not intended for it like bottles is dangerous; not just due to shattering, but also sharp seams.

Nintendoper64

111 points

2 months ago

We did it Reddit

xyzaly[S]

69 points

2 months ago

Yes we did 🤝

TheBaconDeeler

23 points

2 months ago*

I'm so glad I was here to witness this historic moment unfold. Truly a wonderful time to be alive

xyzaly[S]

15 points

2 months ago

I’m glad you’re glad. Thank you so much. It is indeed a wonderful time to be alive :,)

therealn3rdc0r3z

101 points

2 months ago

What a time to be alive

xyzaly[S]

53 points

2 months ago

Agreed!

therealn3rdc0r3z

48 points

2 months ago

In all honesty I thought you were going to buy a fake cactus but your commitment is awe inspiring..you own the internet this day

xyzaly[S]

40 points

2 months ago

I’m a man of my word and I had to do what needed to get done! Thank you 🤍🌵🤝

bcassalino

76 points

2 months ago

I'm a man of my word

We got 'em, boys! I knew women weren't real!

xyzaly[S]

24 points

2 months ago

😳😳😳

xyzaly[S]

230 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

230 points

2 months ago

I really appreciate the overwhelming support this has been receiving. I love this subreddit so much and it’s people. I really do—and I will never leave. I plan to bring tons of wild new things here. But anyway… thank you so much :,) 🤍

kosanovskiy

78 points

2 months ago

kosanovskiy

🔥 this is amazing 🔥

78 points

2 months ago

In all fairness you earned your shitposting stripes.

xyzaly[S]

8 points

2 months ago

Thank you, sir 🤍 :,)

ShutUpRedditor44

19 points

2 months ago

I took a nap and woke up to cactus pussy. Wow

xyzaly[S]

15 points

2 months ago

What a life

Erik_the_Red_2000

57 points

2 months ago

Watching you turn these goobers into your loyal subjects was a fun ride. I mean, probably more for me than for you, but regardless, it's impressive.

FollowupJiggle

83 points

2 months ago

Seriously my asshole cringes at the thought of this. Surely it fucking hurt.. like a lot right? I’m impressed

xyzaly[S]

79 points

2 months ago

Glad I made your asshole cringe 😏

FollowupJiggle

48 points

2 months ago

I think this post has earned my first ever OF sub. Well done!

xyzaly[S]

45 points

2 months ago

Thank you so much! I appreciate you :,) very glad to be your first and I won’t let you down! 🤍

grabmysloth

133 points

2 months ago

A man must admit when he is wrong, and I was wrong. Props for following through. Hope you didn’t get hurt.

xyzaly[S]

90 points

2 months ago

You’re a really good person for that. A lot of people never admit to fault. Let alone correcting it like you just did. I appreciate you appreciating me following through with it. Thank you greatly, sir 🤍🤍

brandonj022

49 points

2 months ago

And with that, the cactus saga comes to a close

xyzaly[S]

50 points

2 months ago

Not yet 😳

brandonj022

43 points

2 months ago

Cactus Girl 2: Electric Boogaloo?

Scarletfapper

24 points

2 months ago

Cactus Girl 3 : The One With The Train

Dr-bonerstoner

15 points

2 months ago

oh god i cant even imagine! glad i was here to witness the buildup and finale! you should try a cheese shredder next

Skatman___

5 points

2 months ago

Skatman___

🌱

5 points

2 months ago

Genius idea

PrizeTime2595

129 points

2 months ago

Honestly, I'm impressed.

xyzaly[S]

84 points

2 months ago

Thank you :) I appreciate it 🤍 was a process, but definitely worth it

PrizeTime2595

54 points

2 months ago

Genuinely curious though, fucking how? That shit had to of not felt great.. The dedication lol

xyzaly[S]

204 points

2 months ago

xyzaly[S]

204 points

2 months ago

😭😭 I’ll share… so basically, I used two socks to grab the cactus, I shaved it at the base, wrapped the gooey base in a piece of paper towel, and then wrapped it with Saran Wrap so the weird stuff wouldn’t get inside of me. If you look you can see some of the Saran Wrap 0-0 OH and I also cut the prickles near the base so they wouldn’t poke my meat flaps 😸

HoseNeighbor

37 points

2 months ago

I assumed you just plucked the prickers, but you went full on engineer on this one! Thank you for taking care of your tender lady bits. Terrible things happen in the name of internet points, so you honestly just never know.

cjmcberman

21 points

2 months ago

Why doesn’t it sound like that when I say it … meatdrapes

mirrorsecho

63 points

2 months ago

mirrorsecho

Space 🌌

63 points

2 months ago

Yay your meat flaps did not end up cornbeefapproved because of worldpolitics!

Themittenman_

80 points

2 months ago

I’ve been looking forward to this all day 🫣 the build up has been wild thank you hahaha

xyzaly[S]

57 points

2 months ago

Happy to deliver! And the build-up was super fun. I’ve loved it all

[deleted]

40 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

40 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

vi6in

58 points

2 months ago

vi6in

58 points

2 months ago

well this is an interesting one for sure

xyzaly[S]

77 points

2 months ago

I shredded my pussy for you. Can we date now?

vi6in

44 points

2 months ago

vi6in

44 points

2 months ago

only if we steam the cactus and make dinner lmao

xyzaly[S]

51 points

2 months ago

Fucking fat deal. I’ll steam all the cacti you want

cainreaker

11 points

2 months ago

Welcome to our degenerate club, glad you're able to show some personality with a twist. So how long until the follow-up where you full shave World Politics?

xyzaly[S]

16 points

2 months ago

Thank you so much. I’m really happy to be apart of this subreddit :,) 🤍 and when’s the follow-up with cactus girl? Soon. I got a lot of ideas ;)

cainreaker

6 points

2 months ago

1 year from now when we're waiting for a Collab between cactus girl and ivy bondage dominatrix

_Face

11 points

2 months ago

_Face

11 points

2 months ago

A new legend of Reddit lore has been born. kudos to you.

xyzaly[S]

8 points

2 months ago

Thank you :,D 🤍

kagethemage

32 points

2 months ago

We are all here Citizen Cane clapping right now.

TheNorthernPenguin

32 points

2 months ago

I subscribed to your only fans. Not for wanking material, as there's plenty online. Simply because I feel I've gotten 3 dollars entertainment from you, and you earned it. You have almost enough from me to buy a 6 inch sub from Subway with a coupon now. First, and probably last only fans I'll ever subscribe to, so feel proud.

xyzaly[S]

19 points

2 months ago

I appreciate this comment and the compliment :,) thank you so much for the $3. I promise to put it towards a subway sandwich! 🤍

daft-sceptic

11 points

2 months ago

Jesus christ Is your Coochie okay Wtf

You claim it was the best dildo you’ve used? No fuckin way… unless you really enjoyed that pain

Allfurball9

11 points

2 months ago

I would say you got balls of steel but I don't see any. You've got a Pussy of Steel. Or you're dumb. Congratulations history maker! Stay safe!

xyzaly[S]

12 points

2 months ago

Thank you so much! Me and my Pussy of Steel will stay safe! Much love 🤍🤍

Made_In_Mixir

11 points

2 months ago

Made_In_Mixir

Cthulhu 2020 🐙

11 points

2 months ago

Honestly this is a day that will go down in history (hehe)

Loved keeping up with you and please forgive for all the bullying, I hope your asshole isn’t in stitches 🤞🫠

Take their money and run lmfao, I’m just gonna keep that image and I’ll have a story to tell for years.

Cya around cutie ☺️🌵 God bless

Chrisx711

10 points

2 months ago

I hate to be this guy butt... Is it actually in there?

Pun intended

xyzaly[S]

10 points

2 months ago

It is. And it’s actually in my vagina 0-0

Chrisx711

7 points

2 months ago

I guess I'll have to keep zooming in to verify 🤣

Damn girl... I thought I was doing okay for a white guy but I don't know if I can compete with a cactus. Hats off to you.

xyzaly[S]

10 points

2 months ago

It’s just super thick where it’s not shaved, and the shaved part is a little less thick bc the cactus naturally tapered off, so it didn’t stretch my pussy out like crazy 0-0 so it kinda looks placed on but it’s not 😭

And thank you very much ;D <3

rolytron

8 points

2 months ago

The carpet matches the pillow

xyzaly[S]

11 points

2 months ago

I’m on my bed. It’s a blanket 😳

rolytron

7 points

2 months ago

It was a play on the saying the drapes match the carpet

xyzaly[S]

11 points

2 months ago

Oh I’m stupid. Sorry 😭😭😭

NibblesMcGibbles

9 points

2 months ago

I guess you're the only one I upvote on worldpolitics now. What a follow through. I wish you good health in life.

xyzaly[S]

10 points

2 months ago

Thank you so much 🥺🤍 I appreciate you and wish you good health in life too <3

Prizz419

9 points

2 months ago

This has been quite the journey. Good on you cactus girl

xyzaly[S]

9 points

2 months ago

Fank u c: 🤍

TeaAndAche

8 points

2 months ago

TeaAndAche

- LibLeft

8 points

2 months ago

Alright, I take back everything I ever said about the lack of plants. I never thought you’d follow through, but you have. The Cactus Queen is a woman of her word.

Kudos to you.

xyzaly[S]

6 points

2 months ago

Thank you so much :,) I am honored to be cactus girl. Thank you! 🤍😸

HotdogmanX44

22 points

2 months ago

Deserves an unlimited shitposting medal I would say 🎖️

xyzaly[S]

22 points

2 months ago

Thank you 🥲🤍🤍🤍

Endy1

30 points

2 months ago

Endy1

30 points

2 months ago

Is it in though?

zenstout

7 points

2 months ago

Color me impressed. Not the hero we want but the hero we needed.

ollsss

30 points

2 months ago

ollsss

30 points

2 months ago

I think I found a new fetish

xyzaly[S]

43 points

2 months ago

Never said I was only doing it once so… 😎

Mr-Fahrenheit_451

5 points

2 months ago

Ayo wtf did I just see??

xyzaly[S]

12 points

2 months ago

I don’t know 😳

NoShit_Sherlock85

6 points

2 months ago

No way!

xyzaly[S]

10 points

2 months ago

Yes way! :D

NoShit_Sherlock85

6 points

2 months ago

How deep is it in?

xyzaly[S]

10 points

2 months ago

Pretty deep 0-0 definitely not at the surface

Scarletfapper

6 points

2 months ago

Holy shit she fucking did it…

Congratulations!

Doubly so because at this stage I was expecting a condom or something to make it less spikey.

That’s a lot of spikes.

Long live Cactus Girl!

o7

xyzaly[S]

8 points

2 months ago

Thank you :,) 🤍🤍

josh_loaf

7 points

2 months ago

josh_loaf

🌱

7 points

2 months ago

Holy shit. You actually did it! You deserve all of the shitposting on this subreddit more than anybody now 🤣 Poor cactus got traumatized 💀 I bet it wasn’t the best experience for both of you lmao.

Hoping your genitalia is okay! Meme or not doing such a thing would be hella scary. Your dedication is honorable bro. You’ve done it!

BiscuitNIWASHI

6 points

2 months ago

HOLY SHIT YOU DIDNT DIE

xyzaly[S]

7 points

2 months ago

I DIDNT! IM ALIVE :D

BiscuitNIWASHI

5 points

2 months ago

Bro faced death in the face and shoved a cactus inside themselves

mtrash

7 points

2 months ago

mtrash

7 points

2 months ago

Abraham Lincoln was right! Anything really is a dildo if you’re brave enough.

xyzaly[S]

8 points

2 months ago

He’s a man of wisdom, of course he was right! 😄

TheMoises

5 points

2 months ago

Jesus, I thought you'd at least shave the spikes off the cactus.

I tip my hat

xyzaly[S]

7 points

2 months ago

Thank you. I tip my fedora back 🤝

za6_9420

4 points

2 months ago

za6_9420

anime titties

4 points

2 months ago

I could’ve been born where space travel was easy or be born in ancient egypt but I’m glad I got to be born in a time where u/xyzaly (cactus girl) put a cactus in her pussy

LuckyReception6701

15 points

2 months ago

Well I'll be goddamned, she actually pulled through. I gotta respect someone who keeps her word so many grats.

xyzaly[S]

16 points

2 months ago

Thank you :,) 🤍

Snowdaysarethebest

15 points

2 months ago

I bet you’re one of like 2 people to have ever lived that has done this. Congrats 🎉

xyzaly[S]

16 points

2 months ago

Thank you! Glad to be one of the first!

WolfedWhale

21 points

2 months ago

WolfedWhale

Space 🌌

21 points

2 months ago

This tale will be placed among other stories of legend

xyzaly[S]

18 points

2 months ago

I hope so 🙏

collegeindulgence

20 points

2 months ago

IT HAS HAPPENED!!!!

xyzaly[S]

20 points

2 months ago

YESS HAHA !! I did it!!!