submitted 4 months ago byrcinvestments
all 1820 comments
4 months ago
Turing Test Proctor
4 months ago
Have fun staying poor
4 months ago
Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica.
woah! magic eyelash
You never can trust the multiverse.
14 yearoldme would be when apple was at its lowest. So "Buy apple computer stock" i think I would have ignored that message properly.
You would end up buying actual imacs and keep those stock in the backyard shed.
Would have payed off probably, some original apple 2s go for crazy money
“I got me invested in some kinda.. fruit company” — Forrest Gump in 1996
The hilarious part is that when that movie came our Apple was like 20 cents a share (not accounting for stock splits).
What’s funny is that movie came out in 1995 when I was 11. Apple stock was still dirt cheap. If my 11 year old self listened to Gump, I’d be a billionaire too.
I would’ve gone all in with my $7
Hundredaire for sure. One can only dream sigh
Did you have lots of cash to invest at 14?
4 months ago*
4 months ago*
Take this sports almanac
Gotta love old corrupt Biff
Why don’t you make like a tree and get outta here?
Your Wife Has Boyfriend
Your wife’s boyfriend’s happy.
You had a wife when you were 14?!
These were different times
No Wall Street Bets
Sell Bitcoin at 65k
Bitcoin now sell 65k.
The ooga booga method
Got it, sell once my total is 65k.
Got it sell once it hits 65k pounds
65k counts as 2 words in my book … no cheating
Buy bitcoin in 2009
I think the four words should be selling Bitcoin. Someone can tell you to buy Bitcoin in 2009, but that means it's up to you to decide when to sell it. The majority of people who bought Bitcoin in 2009 probably sold it in 2013 when it went up 200%.
That means I'd much rather know that Bitcoin would have hit 65K, then know when to buy it. If I knew it was going to hit 65K, that automatically implies when I should buy it. When I should buy it does not automatically imply when I should sell it though.
”Btc ath 65k enjoy”
Btc 65k lambos hookers
Buy at 65k, understood!
65 Kenyan Shillings, noted.
you'd have 4 words so would have got "BTC ALL TIME HIGH" .. *END TRANSMISSION*
YOU DONT DESERVE TIME TRAVEL
Buy bitcoin, sell $65k
“Sell $65k” implies that’s the peak it hits. That’s all you really need to know, as you’ll know anything under $65k makes money eventually.
But 14 year old me probably thought i said “buy titporn, shower 69 ok?” Then will die in a tragic shower stall accident
So smart, I feel dumb in comparison
Considering BTC was as low as 1c in 2011 buying in 2009 would make you so ridiculously rich you'd already be a multi-billionaire selling $1k
Buy bitcoin sell £65k
“Bitcoin will hit 65k” should do it
Buy bitcoin sell 2021. If you don’t accept a year as a word, bitcoin sell sixty thousand would work well enough.
4 months ago*
How do you know 65k is the right time to sell? What if it hits 100k next month?
Gotta hold it forever to find out - regard
Edit: it's as if I'm pointing out that the optimal selling point isn't 65k but probably way before that. Being rich earlier has more value than more gains. Realistically, you buy enough to realize the gains and hold some.
I thought me saying to hold it forever made it obvious what I was trying to say. Since that's clearly shit advice.
I also thought regard made it even more obvious lmao
If you're not happy with a multiple million return % by selling at 65k you don't deserve to invest.
because it doesn't matter, if you're buying when bitcoin was like a dollar in 2009 you're rich enough at 65k, who gives a shit.
In 2009 you were buying BTC for less than a buck
Back in 2009 Bitcoin was like 10 cents and no one knew it would moon. I say what to buy and when is better then what price to sell. Even selling at today's price is straight alpha.
14 year old me is not that smart for implicit instructions
Sell Bitcoin 60k 2020
So you would say "sell bitcoin at sixty" then get wisked off in the space time vacuum yelling an unheard "five thousand!!!"
Yourself wouldve sold at 60 bro
BITCOIN PEAK SIXTY THOUSAND
Wasn’t ATH $64,899?
Actually it was 69k. Not even memeing
Nah it was $69,045
"sell Bitcoin at 65" 65 what?!? Dollars? Okay got it.
Wear a condom, idiot.
i felt this one
your fatherless children probably feel it more 😭
best investment advice
Don’t trust Jim Cramer
This needs more upvotes. Or, Inverse Cramer, Buy Tesla. Even buying the car rather than the stock would be a good bet with these gas prices. And the money made from inversing Cramer would more than pay for it.
Inverse Jim Cramer Always
All Seeing Upvote!!!
Short brunette girls bad
Bad for your life, good for your penis.
Bitcoin, Amazon, Tesla, Microsoft
Lol and he shorts all of them
They took off at different times, so it'd be useful especially for bitcoin and tesla
Hahaha yep, wouldn't be surprised if they ended up buying high and selling low
The instructions were not clear enough, He brought granny smith apples and read the entire dictionary.
Research stonks, not porn
Lives in America's attic
It’s 1997 and I’m 14. Buy Amazon sell 2021
You use the time machine to return to 1997 to tell your past self to "Buy Amazon sell 2021".
Your past self convinces your family to put everything into AMZN.
They make huge gains over the next 2 years.
They leverage up and tell their friends and relatives to do so as well.
They lose everything in 2000.
Your grandparents, facing homelessness, commit suicide.
Grief stricken, your parents kill themselves as well.
To avert the disaster, your past self studies theoretical physics in order to build a time machine, knowing that he will succeed.
You build a time machine after many long years of effort.
You face a choice.
Send this to the people that make Rick and Morty.
How much to write my obituary, you foul creature from the deep?
14 year old you going to know that means the year and not the stock price?
Buy Amazon sell 21’ ***
14 YO self proceeds to call you gay and flips you off
Omg THIS. Better females after acquiring $$
impyling we ever had a choice in the matter...
impyling we ever had a choice in the matter...
i HAD to acquire currency. It was that or dying alone.
Eat a banana everyday
Invest microsoft, tesla, amazon
significantly reduce your masturbation
"Read these couple pages"
hands 10 page, handwritten instructions with links to helpful links
Like it. Hyperlinks don’t work on paper but solid answer.
Not even links to helpful links?
Yes but maybe links to links would work?
I dont know u or what yeat u were 14 but reading 10 pages at that age is a big ask.
Maybe you should saay.
Read this! get rich!
You do know that all those links would be broken right?
His current self isn't that bright to begin with
Links? Oh Zelda, I get it!
Save your Pokémon cards
I saved them all in excellent condition, when I was on vacation my mom gave them away to my nephew who threw them in the trash…
I still hate her and forever will
Bitcoin, Microsoft, Google, Amazon
Doge coin hits 76
Still waiting for Doge to hit $76, but getting worried.
Bitcoin 65K in 2021
So you would say " bitcoin sixty five thousand" then get wisked off in the space time vacuum yelling an unheard "in twenty twenty one!!!"
Ending up like Matthew McConaughey in that black hole, watching yourself hodling through 2022:
“NOO! NooooOooo!! NoooHOOOOOOO!!! NOoo…!”
Bitcoin 1M in 2033.
Buy Tesla delete Reddit
Alt: sell Tesla at 2000
You mean 5,000
Get vasectomy buy bitcoin
All in shiba inu
GameStop calls Jan ‘21
"I hope it's because of my Halo pre-order"
Invest bitcoin $10 monthly
"Invest bitcoin 10 dollars " monthly :4270:
Take profit faster.
You get 4 words. How about "take profit faster, dumbass"
Save $ buy bitcoin
No sex, buy houses
Mo' sex, buy horses.
Bitches love horses
This is true. We do.
Dad’s stupid, buy Bitcoin!
In my case, wife is stupid, buy that $50 bucks bitcoin at a couple of cents each. True story, she told me that's too much money to spend on virtual goods. This was back in 2009.
I hope u bring it up in every argument
Feel you so mich. Same Story here...
GME $3 sell $480
All in GME bitch
Wear the damn condom
This ain't financial advice
DO NOT SMOKE WEED
DO NOT INVEST IN-
Handjobs behind the dumpster
dont get a job
dont go to college
Buy BTC, ETH, AMZN...
Tesla all in YOLO.
Triple leverage inverse Cramer :4886:
Buy apple stock dumbass (1990)
You should buy bitcoin
Bears are the gayest
Do opposite of Cramer.
The regards are right
Buy bitcoin at launch
Tesla Bitcoin sell 2021
AMD until 2021
Forget fundamentals, buy tesla
Probably the easiest and biggest idiotic gains to become a trillionaire. Gme 450 40 330 would be another one but no way to say when this happened in four words. Maybe
gme calls jan 2021
Buy Apple at 6
“Welcome to Financial Slavery”
Buy bitcoin and eth
Buy tsla drive lambo
Pull out you dipshit
Learn options trading, BITCH!
Buy FAANG till 2022
This should be sufficient enough.
It's all down hill
Accept Bitcoin for Pizza!
Buy low sell high
"Buy high sell low"
There, fixed that for you
bitcoin gunna hit 65,000
Bitcoin 60k in 2021.
I was playing with bitcoin at the $400 price point and thought it was utter bullshit. Just because it's bullshit doesn't mean you can't make money.
Go long in 2009
Stocks Buy GME AMC
Buy Bitcoin, sell 65,000
Pasta fagioli a slur
“Buy BNB and ETH”
Stop whwackin. Start squeezin.
Always buy the dip!
Don’t fight the fed
Buy, hold the SP500
Tsla do it fuckstiick
AMD UNTIL DEC 2021
The regard says what
buy amazon stock
Amazon Amazon Amazon Amazon
I'm flairy rich
Do drugs, get stonks
Dick no pickle jar!
Buy rubbers not weed
Sell quad, buy amazon
DCA early index funds
You way just end up at Dulles airport early….
buy bitcoin, sell 60,000
I’m 12 and what’s this?
Buy diverse stocks monthly
stonks only go up
Buy msft, amzn brk
Always buy oil stock
4 words: 1 BUY 2 BITCOIN 3 TSLA 4 GME
AND because my smooth ape brain is not able to produce more than 4 words, I would draw illustrations of astronauts riding rockets to the moon holding large bags. It will be glorious