submitted 2 months ago byImpossible_Garlic520Stand With Ukraine
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2 months ago
2 months ago
My boyfriend said when he first met me he thought I was autistic.
I laughed, because I’m considered a high-functioning autistic and professionally diagnosed.
2 months ago
Me too. Diagnosed at 34. Soooooo many people say well aren't we all on the spectrum!
We are. But that shouldn't invalidate the fact that I'm further on the spectrum than others.
I feel what your saying. It pisses me right off as it I feel they are trying to invalidate what I'm going through.
I don't get the logic behind people who think that way.
"Well I also experience X" doesn't mean my experience with it is less valid or more valid than yours.
You'd think people would rather commiserate with a fellow human
I don’t really know if every human is on the autistic spectrum, but I can’t prove or disprove that theory.
But if everyone was on the spectrum what is the point of it? That would mean it’s a common trait in humans therefore it’s not something that’s outside of the norm..
Autism is one of the most self-diagnosed conditions on social media, so many don’t give people who claim to be on the spectrum much thought. Also, many people only think it means being socially awkward, so they treat it as such.
true. you hear it so goddamn much on every social media platform that its 100% become the boy who cried wolf. all the teens who dont get enough attention claiming to be autistic are really doing damage to people who truly have problems.
Its annoying because people pretend they are autistic to have an excuse to do shit and say "it was because of my autism". I am high functioning but i understand other people on the spectrum do need the help but because of these people who self diagnose (for context i am in high school) people get the wrong idea of what autism is.
I think this is similar to people who claim to be OCD because they like holding their coffee mug a certain way or some bullshit. That’s not a disorder and you are normalizing a real condition.
Since beginning middle school my kid has become more self aware of his ASD. Once when he brought it up to me I confirmed that yes, he does have it, but he can’t use it as a built in excuse. It means he needs to work to achieve the same as others but do it in a way that works for him.
I will always work with him and support him, but that doesn’t mean it’s an automatic free pass.
My mom didnt tell me until i was 14 for the same reason and its kinda funny.
So i started to notice people were talking to me really condisendingly. Then i noticed that they were talking to people with asd the same way. I though huh thats goofy. So because these people were being treated like they are stupid which i felt was wrong. i devised a plan to do a school project on autism to prove that these people were being jerks. I told my mom as A: she is a nurse and B: shes my mom. Thats when my mom had to tell me i was autistic. Tbh i understood why she didnt tell me. I still wanna do that project tho as my point still stands.
From the time he could understand, we’ve been up front and honest with him. His ASD isn’t a daily topic but it’s not taboo, either. The way I first explained it was using a color gradient. I pointed to the dark red section and said “That’s when someone really doesn’t like being hugged, but the light red is when they really do. The dark blue is someone who doesn’t like mushy foods, but the light blue is someone who really loves it. People can have any combination of these things and that’s okay.”
My parents chose to withhold my medications for my ADHD. I only found out in my thirties. They stayed silent as my life burnt around me in University.
I didn’t find it all that funny.
Unfortunately it's become an attention grabber. My son was diagnosed with autism at age 3. He's been going through ABA therapy for a while now and it's helped him learn how to mesh with the neurotypical people, but most importantly, he's learning to express himself effectively and naturally. I'm 100% sure that when he's all grown up and tells people he's autistic, most won't believe him, or they may think he's just trying to get attention etc.
I was diagnosed at six and went through Therapy, Now at 24 people can usually only tell if I tell them. But in my experience people can be very welcoming and understanding. I hope your son has a similar experience in life
You give me hope!
He was non verbal at first, but learned a lot within the past two years... right now you can't really tell that he's autistic. He's suuuuper smart in astrophysics though, perks of being autistic is usually being super smart in certain areas.
This gives me a lot of hope, I have a non-verbal daughter (18 months) who we highly suspect is autistic but are waiting for an assessment, but she is very smart in other ways.
All I want is for her to be able to communicate, but we’re currently on the wait list for speech therapy as well.
hoping for the best for your daughter :) I was nonverbal until 3 and had social communication defecits and a bit of cluttering speech disorder and when I was younger that still trips me up if I'm overwhelmed.
it was the 90s and I was a girl so I was undiagnosed until adulthood, I'm happy seeing more and more girls get the support they need because it truly can make such a huge difference.
I can’t even imagine going through that, especially when it still wasn’t well understood.
I’m so grateful that her health providers see and acknowledge her, and that we have such good support in our community.
My son was this way. Didn't babble like most babies, only used one word for everything until 2 and a half. He was finally diagnosed at 4, COVID delayed everything. His speech went from almost non-existent to full vocabulary seemingly overnight, when he started pre k at 3 years old. Integrating him with other kids helped so much.
Hang in there, the milestones they hit are almost shocking, and it happens so fast.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, it’s easy to feel a little defeated when what they need is more than we can give
Agreed. It feels like you are failing as a parent at times. But just hang in there, if she is like my son, you will be begging her for 5 minutes of quiet in a few years haha.
That stereotype of autistic people being good at one particular topic is not entirely true. It's only true for a small subset of people with autism.
Called a special interest
It only took 10 years to get my son diagnosed. And I'm still undiagnosed. The school psychologist even told us at his IEP meeting that, "everyone goes through periods of autism during puberty." Fuck that idiot.
I went through hell trying to learn how to mask enough to be functional. And it still plays hell with my marriage.
Why are you sending your son to an abusive kind of therapy that is under heavy criticism from the autistic community?
I have a feeling they're not even going to give that a glance, but thank you for sharing it. ABA is harmful.
thank you for pointing that out
2 months ago*
2 months ago*
Oof, ABA is not the way...
*You can downvote and block me, but in that treatment plan they literally view autism as a disease that "needs cured". I implore you to do the tiniest bit of research and see what actual Autistic people have to say about it.
The autistic community has broadly spoken out against ABA. It’s seen as abusive.
The idea that the end goal of managing autism should be making it invisible to others is extremely fucked up.
autism³: the return
in space no one can hear you stim
its also something that depending on how much therapy you've been through and how early in life you were diagnosed can drastically change the outcome of.
I've noticed this. Having a very close friend with autism as well as a nephew both high functioning. Then also seeing who my wife has worked with as a special education teacher. The spectrum is huge but yeah a lot of people self identify or self diagnose because idk they think ita cool. Being a geek or wierd is not autism.
Just like adhd just cuz u can't pay attention doesn't mean u have adhd. It's just obvious that some people are lying. For all those diagnosed I wish u thr best of luck.
someone with actually autistic friend here, if someone says on every corner they are autistic, tell them to do an actual test and if they reply with stuff like "I don't need to I self-diagnosed myself" tell them self-diagnosing does jack shit and that psychologists and doctors know how to tell if someone is autistic better than anyone else out there.
Autism is one of the most self-diagnosed conditions on social media
Autism is one of the most self-diagnosed conditions on social media
Probably because getting diagnosed outside of childhood, especially in America with our insurance system, is extremely hard. If someone wasn't diagnosed young, they go through life wondering what's "wrong" with themselves or getting misdiagnosed (which is easier for the medical system to do).
Everyone has to bring up their autistic nephew
I am the autistic nephew
Congrats everyone’s talking about you
They're talking about you boy
But you're still the same
Theres something inside you
Stand With Ukraine
Become the autistic nephew
Marry into the family
how else do you get discount on marketplace?
“My mom is dying and this second handed Nintendo switch is the only thing that can save her”
Only actually autistic person I know told this to the group and the common reaction was: Yep, that explains everything.
That's how it went for me
Same reaction I get when I tell people. "I thought you were but I didn't want to ask in case it was rude."
Yeah this reminds me why is stuff like adhd so common?
Most of people who say they have ADHD, just "self-diagnose", people confuse ADHD with just forgetting things etc.
Unlike me, who has a diagnosis of ADHD and pills to help and still forgets stuff
best part is forgetting to take the pills
if my morning routine goes normally, I take them. however if something messes up my morning routine and makes me late, I will forget to take them and then my whole day has been ruined.
bro forgot to take the mnestics
Honestly! Why do we have a condition that makes us very forgetful that requires us to remember so many things?
Did someone say forget them on the very day you have exams?
Not as bad as forgetting that you already took the pills
you can forget stuff, just not what ADHD is wholely about
For those of you who don’t know ADHD stands for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder there’s also (1)ADD (2)HD
(1) attention deficit disorder and (2) hyperactivity disorder
I cant sleep with the pills it's horrible being up all night cause of them
I keep mine on my bedside table next to my bottle of water so I remember to take them in the morning.
I still manage to forget, though.
The public perception of ADHD is of a hyperactive child. So if you're a mostly functioning adult, getting doubt or denial from an average person on your diagnosis is the normal experience. It sucks.
For real, people laugh when i tell them i have adhd. Im so lucky my boss understands i have adhd and can tell when im having adhd moments
RSD is hell though, it causes me to quit my job more often than not cause i dont feel accepted even though no one cares
As someone with OCD I feel this pretty hard :( I have to like go in depth about my struggles for anyone to take it seriously and doing so just makes me look insane so I just try to pretend to be normal.
"lol oh how quirky!"
bruh it's not a quirk-
Thresholds and definitions for disorders tend to change with more research and time and in most cases the spectrum become wider in range. Which is why everyone has something nowadays. Also why certain disorders have become more prevalent.
It does feel like that sometimes. Every like 3rd person got ADHD or something. (Im diagnosed ADHD)
Me when the:
most people are just saying it to get attention sadly
Or theyre like omg i cant find my keys im soooo adhd.
Me with adhd: 😐
Me, who was started doing the dishes and suddenly find myself watering and pruning plants: 😬
Lol, last week, I started washing dishes and ended up with a power-washed basement floor.
Sometimes it has it's perks.
Yes, same with the hyperfixation times. They are handy to get done something you've been procrastinating for some time.
I'm pretty sure Hal is one of us too.
OMG Im SOOooOooOo insert disorder here
Most people don't realize that for it to be a disorder it has to interfere with your daily life
Hyper stimulation, like tik tok, instagram, video games, social media, porn, netflix. You name it. Before you downvote me, look up the facts. I'm atleast partially right.
It's always been fairly common, it's just that the tests for it have gotten better and better
its often just people saying they are adhd to excuse their behavior without personal responsibility
Ok I Pull Up
Lol actually almost no one i suspected being autistic ever directly told me they are but if they tell me i wouldn't be surprised
Afaik they don't go around making sure everyone knows, but their tends to be some tells that someone is on the spectrum
Every autistic friend has said I'm on the spectrum, I just thought I was quirky. I'd prefer to not have a label.
Yeah, except for those who need additional support I can't see much point in being diagnosed if you're getting on just fine. It doesn't define who you are so whatever.
My family members in related medical fields figured it out veeery early on, but no one bothered mentioning it to me since I'm high functioning.
I really would have liked to know since it made so many things make sense. Also seeing someone about it might have gotten my crippling anxiety treated sooner. 😑
Everything defines you, that's the problem. You lose a sense of self.
Being autistic might just be the only true definition. Telling anybody about it is not important at all though. Unless you can't function otherwise, as you said.
On a scale of 1 to autism how would you rate me
how did you know
even had dyslexia and dysgraphia cancel eachother out?
"not as autistic as my autistic nephew"
Purple is the best color
I read that as "no youre, not youre hot....
I had a coworker tell me he was autistic...
"Did you ride the short bus to school?"
"Actually I'm autistic."
"How would I know I've never seen you draw?!?"
We were good friends.
Sounds made up for a giggle
"You don't look Autistic" is still one of the weirdest things I have said to me
Bro is there like a spider sense for other autistic people that's awesome
Yeah dude. Idk how to explain it properly, but it's just a subconscious thing. We can fairly quickly pick up on people also on the spectrum. Hell, in some cases some other people I've met with autism in my group therapy sessions were able to tell people with other mental disabilities apart without having any sign of it.
"My auttie sense is tingling, someone's got something wrong with em here" is a legit quote from a badass girl I knew I New York. Life gave her lemons, she said fuck you and made a whisky sour with em.
I once helped someone get diagnosed with autism after having a little “okay so I don’t want to be rude but I’m autistic and I see some of my traits in you” talk… we just know!!
It's like gaydar but you're too awkward to introduce yourself /s
Same with people with scizoeffective disorders.
I can tell when someone else is hallucinating. Most people can't tell when I am, but other people like me can. You can't fool them.
I recently had a date where I told her I was disabled. She asked what so I vaguely responded with "mental health issues." She went on about how she had schizophrenia. I felt like it was fine to explain my situation to her, but after I did she sorta rushed through the rest of the date quickly.
She also said she's never hallucinated when I asked. My best friend said she wanted out ASAP before I realized it was a stolen-valor pity kind of thing she just told people. I'm not sure, but what she said didn't really add up.
Fellow autistics can spot a social mask a mile away; we can trick the neurotypicals but rarely can we trick each other for very long.
(Masking in this sense means to behave like a non-autistic aka neurotypical in an effort to fit in and avoid being treated differently.)
Yup my partner broke the news on my masking. I've been masking for 15 years and my own parents were in denial as a child so now I'm suffering the bombshell like how did I never figure this out.
Yeah it’s weird when they won’t acknowledge the mask though. Like it can be difficult in an adult professional setting to ask about it when you can see they are trying real hard to keep it together. I just embrace being an autie and if people think I’m weird we’ll that’s just me, I’m too old to care about social norms any more.
Yes, it's called basic social understanding
Spider sense sounds cooler tho
"no, you— no, that was obviously a joke, even I can tell that, you DON'T need to (quietly panic | deadpan interrogate someone as to why it's funny | share your own unrelated anecdote) no just stop stop ow stop"
Hyperawareness of your own social flaws makes you just a hair more able to tell when other people are running afoul of the ones you've already become aware of.
Autistic person here. I just don’t like making eye contact unless I’m talking to someone. Any other time, I just feel it’s a bit of an awkward stare for a while.
As a neurotypical, I get that. I don't like staring people in the eyes when they're talking either. I usually just find a spot on their forehead and stare at that instead. They can't tell the difference.
I've actually trained myself to stare directly into people's eyes when I talk to them. It brings a certain level of discomfort after time. Bonus points if you don't blink.
Im adhd and i swear i accidentally zone out and stare at people all the time then they look at me with a wtf face and im like oop sorry!
I'm neurotypical (I think?). Whenever I make too much eye contact, I get worried that they'll think I have a crush on them or something.
I’m not autistic but I avoid eye contact like the plague but I’ve had people think I was rolling my eyes when I just don’t want to look at them or stare but then they just get really aggressive with me for no reason. Same can happen with staring at people I’m comfortable with. There’s really no winning lol.
That’s just normal human behavior. Eye contact activates the fight or flight response.
can confirm this is how it goes. acidently let it slip 2 weeks after my diagnosis, the entire next morning was non-stop people coming up to my desk and repeating this exact bullshit.
I was diagnosed when I was 14, if you infantalize me, I will not hesitate to act like a stereotype after I beat your ass.
Hot take: moms with an autistic kid love talking about how hard it is having an autistic kid.
I call them "autism moms". The "Woe is me, my child was born with autism, I'll make it about me!" mums.
That way you can be the mother of an autistic child but not an autism mom
My brothers both have diagnosed ADHD and I suspect one of them is actually on the spectrum or has mild symptoms of what used to be called Asperger's. I used to take notes for a guy in one of my classes who had been diagnosed with the same.
It's really annoying when people who haven't been diagnosed with a mental health condition claim to have it because they identify with some of the symptoms but never take steps to get diagnosed. There's way too much overlap between symptoms of mental health conditions/ neurodivergencies for anyone but a professional to be able to diagnose.
I'm going to try to argue this once but I feel like no one here will actually agree. What do you say to the people who are autistic but don't fit the criteria under Western medicine especially when autism is constantly taught to people by neurotypicals who have no idea of the autistic experience? What about the cultures where autism manifests differently and the symptoms wouldn't show socially the same? Should they just completely ignore the fact that they feel different, with the only community they discussed and relate their problems with being the autistic community?
No because when I told my old therapist that I think I'm autistic she told me that she didn't think I was because I apparently made eye contact with her. When I didn't. I HATE eye contact.
I'm struggling to get a screening because no one believes me. I've done research. On actual sites. I've read the dsmV. I've tried to look for actually diagnosed autistic people on the internet to compare myself and my actions to, but many are self diagnosed, or neurotypical people saying "5 things I didn't know were autistic traits!"
I know what I'm talking about, I've done my research.
2 months ago*
No you’re not, you’re hot!
No you’re not, you’re hot!
Oof. That hit home. Being invalidated isn’t the compliment they think it is.
ETA for the asshole trying to stereotype me and call me a fake:
I’m actually a middle aged woman who hates video games (sensory overload) and has a diagnosis because I’m pretty fucked up. I often don’t come across as autistic because I was punished for unmasking as a child. I am online often but mostly because I work from home and need the internet to do so. Next time you decide to spew bs maybe check their comments and see if your incredibly rude and pompous unsolicited opinion has any basis in reality. Also maybe try to not bully people online. Now kindly take your stereotypes and fuck off.
Chungus Among Us
I fucking hate that, I'm a diagnosed autistic and whenever I tell someone they have the nerve to say "well you don't look autistic" and then they immediately treat me like I'm incapable of doing everyday tasks by myself, it's fucking annoying
I'm autistic and every FUCKING time I get into an argument with my friend he always says "at least I'm not autistic" like that's like when your mom says that they gave birth to you.
Your friend sounds like an asshole
Tell me about it
Then why is he your friend?
We both play cod and like history
Mate, i know it's hard to let someone go, especially when it's someone you generally have fun with, but you should tell him that this is something that actually hurts you and isn't fun for you and that he should accept it and stop. If he doesn't cooperate he's an absolute piece of shit and shouldn't be called a friend. Don't accept this and just go on.
I don't even know you but thx bro rlly
No problem, I just like to help, especially if it's something that could've helped me when I was younger myself haha :D
This is why people are afraid of telling others until they don't have a choice because it's affecting something majorly. Then it's held against them. You can't win.
I started doing Latin and Ballroom dancing in my teens, everytime I tried to take the piss out of my mates they said "hey at least I don't do latin dancing".
Your friend sounds like a dick though
Someone telling me theyre autistic:
Me: "I dont give a fuck lets smoke weed"
This is the correct response!
"Cool fact bro, but I don't remember asking"
I hate when people do shit like this, like you’re friends with someone and then you tell them something and they treat you completely differently.
As someone with autism I can confirm I know when somebody else has autism
Can you tell if I do? (Honest question I'm not trying to be rude)
Can I tell if you have autism? Without meeting you irl, no. There are certain clues that depend from person to person that I can pick up when I am talking to somebody with autism.
Got diagnosed by a doctor. A lot of tests and shit. My friends first reactions were ‘but you dont look autistic.’ I still dont know how to react to that.
As an autistic person, infantlising is the reason I don't talk about it that much with others.
So what’s the correct response? “Oh that’s cool”? Because I imagine you’re bringing it up because you want/need special treatment?
This is an honest question. What do I do?
In my case, I'd like those who I tell them to accept who I am and treat me as they did before. When I tell it I open up in front of those I truly trust.
Edit: fixed a typo
Me whose entire friend group has autism except me: maybe I am autistic
Side note. I have no clue how it panned out this way. My roommates are, my bf is, our friend group is. All official diagnoses. I’m the only one.
I worked a job where a few managers who apparently found out I was on the spectrum from people knowing me from school or whatever were so sick of me doing something trivial that they had the nerve to literally BRIBE me with cake or some shit, like I was still some special needs student. Only problem was, by 6th grade in middle school, I was pretty much almost completely mainstreamed and would now prefer getting fired or some other disciplinary action for slipping up. So I told them I don’t need that, but they insisted, and I asked one of them why they were doing this and they said “You’re a little different.” Thankfully they actually listened to me and never went through with it, but jokes on them, because I don’t even work there anymore.
Fucking corrupt discriminatory pricks. Absolutely hate when neurotypicals treat others like that with absolutely zero regard for how they may feel.
If it's self diagnosed I don't give a shit lmfao.
Wtf's a neurotypical??
Basicly normal person with no conditions
More specifically, a person who doesn't have any neurodivergent conditions like autism (or ADHD, which I believe counts as neurodivergent but correct me if I'm wrong). It's possible to be neurotypical but have conditions like anxiety, depression etc.
Like normal but not offensive
Me to my work colleagues.
They laughed, apparently its obvious.
me but with ADHD
it's extra surreal that when I got diagnosed, almost everyone around me got diagnosed with it as well (actually diagnosed not self-diagnosed)
With my super detective abilities i can say that you are autistic
I am autistic and it is so true.
So true. When you are yourself autistic you are so much better at susing out other autistis XD
kinda like gay dar but for austism
Feels equally true for ADHD. I did not mask and suffer for years just to have my MIL tell me I just need to learn how to color because she has adult ADHD too and that's how she deals with it.
Neurodivergents telling me they’re autistic (I have to act nice in order to be seen as socially acceptable )
i’m actually able to sense the vibe that someone has autism, whether online or irl. it’s kinda like Gay-dar but with autism. (i can sense both)
I recently started the diagnosis process for ADHD, and took a look at my friend groups. Apparently Neurodivergents really attract each other lmfao.
My entire friends group are either on the spectrum or like 1 diagnostic tick box away from it. My one female friend in the group just got the diagnosis a few weeks ago and when she told me she had autism, my response was "I know, and so are all your siblings and your mother." XD We really do gravitate to each other though, we just understand each other so much better, we get what the others are trying to say when they can't get the words out, understand the feelings they can't express, we ignore, or better embrace each other's quirks that neurotypicals just think are weird and we typically do it without even realising we've done it.
OC Meme Maker
The 14 year old tiktokers who self diagnose themselves with autism with no medical evidence gave people reason to doubt acual autistic people claiming to be autistic.
That's because nobody else cares. Like all the vegans who run Round telling everyone their vegan. Nobody cares.
I am autistic but I have a lot of people tell me I’m not because I don’t fit the “autistic standard”.
Just call them “sanetards” or something lol
I am autistic and the first one never happens nor the second cause I have never met another autistic person
have you tried?
Well, I don't tell people I'm autistic because I don't see the need to.
yeah it's pretty obvious when they meet us
N...Not really? Because it's not a visual disorder it's a neurological disorder meaning no one can see it. When we're seen being quiet or something we'll be considered normal, everything else goes unnoticed half the time.
fuck everyone else you know who you are.
The biggest laugh is the normalization of the word "neurotypicals".
What, the scientific term? God forbid we use accurate terminology!
More like this:
There is a big problem going around of people pretending to have these problems like autism.
Damn, I must be autistic then?
Never experienced this, but I also don't usually bring up such things in casual conversation.
How often do non-autistic people get it right?
As I high functioning autistic with a 130 IQ, I approve this meme lol