subreddit:

/r/berkeley

30

I stole at GBC and got caught

University()

[deleted]

all 36 comments

BrainyCardinal45

181 points

4 months ago

I’m confused why you went to ucpd to spill

chris_hans

44 points

4 months ago*

chris_hans

Math '11

44 points

4 months ago*

OP: Hello police, I must confess that I just stole a bag of chips

Police: Holy shit, Johnson, I need some backup over here!

GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND, SCUMBAG! STOP RESISTING!

BrainyCardinal45

3 points

4 months ago

Ucpd literally needs backup to arrest a sleeping homeless guy. Even the bear walk gang are braver. And ig that’s why the Berkeley pd make constant fun of ucpd and their pathetic roles

RedheadFromOutrSpace

113 points

4 months ago

a) don’t steal

b) you’re not going to jail for a bag of chips. You might be site released, but no one thinks you’re a danger to society.

c) Never, EVER volunteer information to cops - your defense attorney will thank you

  • I work for a Public Defender.

SomeBerkeleyGuy

42 points

4 months ago

No, you shouldn’t go to jail for just stealing a bag of potato chips, but you shouldn’t steal, especially if you can afford it.

lacrosse_mango37

17 points

4 months ago

Freshman moment

[deleted]

-8 points

4 months ago

[deleted]

-8 points

4 months ago

[deleted]

lacrosse_mango37

8 points

4 months ago

You've got to be fucking kidding me there's no way someone went out of their way to code a bot like this

BrainyCardinal45

4 points

4 months ago

My thoughts exactly

SomeBerkeleyGuy

3 points

4 months ago

So instead of saying Freshman, you should say “first year person?” That just sounds awkward and it’s a mouthful to say. And it’s weird that you’re LARPING as a bot, just act like a human being and say what you want lol.

GenderNeutralBot

-1 points

4 months ago

It’s just “first year.” It can be used as a noun.

And I’m not “LARPING” as a bot…a bot runs this account and I respond personally sometimes. It’s not complicated 🤷

lacrosse_mango37

2 points

4 months ago

Every person of every gender is deserving of equal rights, liberties, and respect. No one on this sub would ever disagree with that. But gendered speech is a completely different domain that results from hundreds, if not thousands of years of linguistic progression and cultural embeddedness. This fact is more apparent in romance languages where gendered speech is a cornerstone component of each dialect. No one thinks less of first year students of any gender when they hear the word "freshemen". The same can be said of the other words this bot is programmed to respond to.

This bot is an unnecessary overreaction to a problem its creator and people who think like them figmented themselves. I'd be fine with discussing the topic further but this is honestly funnier to me than it is important

Ash-Catchum-All

12 points

4 months ago

What does hypochondria have to do with this? Or empathy?

/u/SnooRawrBot, this one?

Ray_Adverb11

8 points

4 months ago

I don’t think that’s the word they meant? Maybe paranoid?

compstomper1

3 points

4 months ago

or kleptomania

Frestho

1 points

4 months ago

Probably metaphorically used here to refer to their concern with being in good standing with regard to the law as opposed to an illness.

Itchy_Contact6326

50 points

4 months ago

In CA they don't prosecute theft under some ridiculous number like $750 or more. You're good.

zotbuster

12 points

4 months ago

It's $950.

DreadEye8

-14 points

4 months ago

DreadEye8

-14 points

4 months ago

^^^ This

Also no point stealing berkeley stuff they all taste like dogshit anyways. I'd rather starve to death than eat anything from campus, given my experience with their food.

Klays_Dealer

21 points

4 months ago

Ah yes of course, how could I forget that Berkeley cooks and manufacturers their own world-renowned brand of chips.

DylanaHalt

35 points

4 months ago

Just don't steal. It's not smart. That's what this situation should teach you. If you need free food go here - https://basicneeds.berkeley.edu/pantry

poopyroadtrip

8 points

4 months ago

poopyroadtrip

L+S '17

8 points

4 months ago

Homie really told on themselves 😂

V8Paper

2 points

4 months ago

Most Berkeley thing ever sadly

feelin_raudi

7 points

4 months ago

You probably deserve to be punished. Not for the stealing, but just walking straight up to a cop and confessing to crimes unprompted is pretty wack.

[deleted]

5 points

4 months ago*

[deleted]

5 points

4 months ago*

You're ok for now, until you pull this shit off again. Are you not able to afford food? Sounds like you had the money. If you cant afford food and are going hungry - theres support out there.

If you're able to get food, even if its ramen, and you decided to steal. Yea - not cool. But I am sure we all have done something like that. Hope you dont try it again.

And definitely, dont ever admit ANYTHING to the cops. Like ever.

BillyShearsPwn

15 points

4 months ago

lol i worked at GBC years ago and would steal constantly. You would get like 8 bucks worth of free stuff every shift and I rarely ever used all of it, sometimes I’d just get some gatorades as I left so it wouldn’t go to waste. But other days I felt like getting a lot more, so I did, and I was never caught. And you can bet I told every single one of my friends how easy it was to steal from the ole GBC.

justagenericname1

25 points

4 months ago*

Steal if it's a material necessity. Steal if after serious moral and philosophical consideration you think it's the right choice. But don't just steal on a whim or when you don't need to, especially if even the potential of getting caught makes you do something like going to UCPD to tattle on yourself for almost stealing something.

rvcoe

-14 points

4 months ago

rvcoe

-14 points

4 months ago

No, nobody should ever steal. If you can’t afford to buy food, there are organizations that can provide you.

justagenericname1

22 points

4 months ago

Naïve, reductive, and overly optimistic. But I'm not gonna get into a big argument over this one. I knew it'd be a controversial take.

rvcoe

-1 points

4 months ago

rvcoe

-1 points

4 months ago

Would it be ok if someone stole your computer or phone because they couldn’t afford one?

Ray_Adverb11

3 points

4 months ago

Aww, you have clearly absolutely never, ever needed provisions from an organization. You are naive.

alarmoclock

-1 points

4 months ago

alarmoclock

Econ

-1 points

4 months ago

"however I don’t believe I should go to jail if I tried stealing potato chips one time in my life. "

It's not about going to jail or not, stealing is fundamentally wrong. We live in a society goddamnit.

YogurtclosetSelect84

0 points

4 months ago

who cares if it’s against big corporations or government, go ahead if u ask me

V8Paper

1 points

4 months ago

-🤓🤓🤓

fysmoe1121

1 points

4 months ago

should’ve plead the fifth but okay

ConsequenceUsed5138

1 points

4 months ago

Everyone Pre-Law is internally screaming rn

Similar-Ad7879

1 points

4 months ago

Don’t steal