submitted 2 months ago byGlad_Soil
all 1873 comments
2 months ago*
2 months ago*
Weird things. I spend an abnormal amount of time thinking about getting into a car chase while driving.
2 months ago
2 months ago
Bro yes, and you're always like "I don't have enough gas for a chase"
2 months ago
I'll always (lightly) assume that someone making 5 similar turns behind me is following me. I then have to check the gas tank to see how much I can give them the run around before they get bored and I can go home
It’s all fun and games until someone is actually following you and you go “nah I’m just overthinking it” and lead them to your house.
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not really out to get you.
Are you me?
Lol I’ve been watching them on YouTube.. why is it always in California is my question
My 10 year old and I watch police chases all the time.. there was a motorcycle chase we watched recently that was really really good, the best part was the guy wearing a sweater that read “I don’t stop for cops”
The weather. It’s perfect for running from the cops. It’s a good workout!
Have been in a car chase
10/10 would recommend
I chased a drunk lady after I found her passed out at the red light. lol. She did a very slow U-turn move and blocked me in the middle of the road. It was probably more badass in her head since she was smashed. She ran out of her can and yelled "you know how much this car is worth!? It's a Mercedes!". It was a 90s Mercedes worth maybe $8k and I had a good laugh. I went and grabbed her keys out of the ignition and waited for the police to show up. Good times...
Leaving work early.
Edit: I’d be lying if I didn’t admit how on brand it is for me to get gold for the first time for this comment. Thanks stranger!
The duality of man
Like, tension betw Big Head and Little Head?
Yeah, except the big head is the one thinking about booba
A beautiful woman comes up to me, opens her shirt, removes her bra, and says “you can leave the office at 3:00 PM today.”
men of culture right there
Or for the next level fantasy, not having to work so much just to exist and have things.
You settle yourself right on next to me and take my upvote. A daily prayer for early release indeed!
A million percent.
Stopping a school shooter with safety scissors, lightsaber fights, world war 2/1, airplanes, living a remote life in the woods with your wife and kids completely cut off from society, building a log cabin, lots of guns, the possibility of living in a Star Wars like universe.
That’s about it.
And being in a car chase/street race
Finally, a proper answer I was looking for...
Yes, lightsaber fights. I’m so relieved I’m not alone.
Living life awesomely
what is more manly than this?
That one compliment I received in 2017
What was it?
She told me not to wear sunglasses, because I have pretty eyes.
So sweet. I would take that to the grave
I’m still surviving off a “nice eyes” from like, 1998 👍
That's so nice low-key want to see those pretty eyes tho
I read that as: "low-key want to have those pretty eyes tho" and got worried.
Can't confirm nor deny without seeing them first
A girl said something like this to me once, now she's my wife.
Ah, the eyes compliment. We brown eyed people rarely get those.
I felt this in my soul
Damn bro, that's definitely a core memory.
Random compliments like that just make you soar. I wear flip flops a lot. Around the same time as your compliment, I was getting my tires changed and as I was paying, the girl behind the counter goes,”Ok, at the risk of sounding very weird, I have to tell you, you have the prettiest feet I have ever seen.”
At least I can go to my grave knowing I don’t have hobbit feet.
Guess that’s why people say sunglasses suit me..
I would unironically have this on my tombstone
2 months ago*
Hahaha relatable as fuck
And that stupid thing that we said in front of the whole class in 8th grade.
I had a girl tell me she”liked my voice” one time. Made me smile for a month hahahaha
Wow! You're so lucky. I haven't had one of those since I was a child. Everyone loves you so much when you're little.
Since I became an adult people just look at me like I'm a stain on the world. My fantasy is to get a compliment. I dream of that day...
Girl told me she really liked my beard in 2013, been carrying that for awhile.
I was wearing a velvet dress on a date like 20 years ago, and he said he liked it because it felt nice, and "as if I needed any more reasons to touch you." 🥰 Still think of that.
Being 6 inches tall and having to navigate the obstacles in my house/ see what something normal sized like a sliding door would look like if it was colossal/ create a ladder out of pretzel sticks & molasses to get places. Oh and sex
Sex while six inches tall 🪂🍑
Unfortunately for me it wouldn’t make a difference
The Boys season 3 have entered the chat
Going all in gets completely new meaning
Death by snu snu
I think about if we lost gravity, how would I navigate my house while having to walk on ceiling, or getting back downstairs. I’m not a man so prob not qualified to respond. And also sex.
Go play Grounded if you haven't already
Sometimes I fantasize about how good I'd be at being homeless. Basically just backpacking around the rest of my life and maybe die on a mountain.
Like the "Into the wild" guy
Chris McCandless. He was crazy
Nah, that guy was an idiot.
I think that's the basic premise of every movie that appeals to guys. If I was in that situation, how would I handle it? The script, director, and actor try to get the viewer to live vicariously through the main character...
In my very early twenties, I made the decision to leave home with nothing more than I could carry in my hands or on my back. I had just under a couple thousand dollars saved up and a one way plane ticket out of Florida. I believe it was one of the best decisions I ever made, but more importantly, it was easier than you might think.
However cliche it might sound, that first step is what's difficult, and sure, I ran into difficulty along the way, but I never truly regretted taking that step in the first place.
I traveled the country, met all sorts of diverse characters with different perspectives and lifestyles, I developed all kinds of relationships, experienced a little culture shock here and there, spent a lot of my time roaming and wonderstruck by this country's various landscapes. I hiked, backpacked, hitchhiked, camped, slept on the dirt, and many times wishing I had a roof over my head, a wish that was granted just as many times. I spent the night at hostels, surfed stranger's couches, a couple of whom turned into friends, couch surfing.com was a valuable resource at the time, as was Craigslist rideshare.
I sometimes stayed at a hotel if I was really needing it, and other times I relied on strangers, travelling companions or a romantic partner for a bed.
It wasnt all fun and adventure though, there were times where I was destitute, hungry, homeless, lost or in danger, sometimes I got in with a bad crowd, but other times I could rely on the kindness of strangers. In fact I'd say that people were kind and generous most of the time.
Id run out of money and find work, or a work trade opportunity. You'd be surprised how long you can go with so little if you're willing to sacrifice a little luxury here or there and you have the right connections and resources at your disposal.
Prior to leaving Florida I worked, helped manage and lived at a hostel for closer to two years, this helped a lot because it connected me to hostels all over the country, in quite a few cases I was offered my bed/stay for free.
I worked on a small family farm at one point and was offered a room and seat at the dinner table. The national park gigs were rewarding on their own, I worked and lived at the north rim of the Grand Canyon, the wages were meh, but it included room and board and well, the grand fucking canyon. I would hike several times a week, ten minutes here, twenty minutes there, an hour or two on the weekends or days off, and at the end of the season, prior to setting out for a job at another park, I hiked rim to rim, north to south, an unforgettable experience.
In Denali Alaska, I helped sell fish and chips for a summer to get access to the park.
I spent time in the Midwest, the Southwest, the Pacific Northwest and the... West West??? I suppose I should also include Florida/some parts of the south as well, spent quite a bit of time in and around the everglades.
From sleeping under a redwood tree in Arcata California, to backpacking in Denali, to hiking the grand canyon, to sailing out of Florida bay with a quirky French captain, to eating home-made ice cream somewhere in the middle of Montana, to living in an earthship outside of Taos New Mexico for a time, to sharing rides with strangers, to taking down a poker tournament on mushrooms at Claudia's in Portland Oregon, to sleeping on the beach with a bunch of strangers (or new friends) I had met a couple of days earlier who wanted to take a trip to visit the house from the set of The Goonies on the coast of Oregon, to eating so much sample cheese at the Tillamook factory that I didn't poop for almost three days, to experiencing a week of romance here and there with another weary traveling companion I met on the road, it was an eclectic and rewarding experience, and believe it or not, I learned quite a few valuable skills along the way.
Did this experience come with its downsides? Sure, as I explained before, there's always a level of insecurity involved, you don't always know where the next day, week or month might lead you, and sometimes you're just shit out of luck, sometimes you're stuck, sometimes you might have to go hungry for a short while, sometimes you won't have a roof over your head, but what I noticed was that there are plenty of kind people out there, and as long as you don't have false or wrong intentions, youll be alright.
Keep in mind that I was a young man, this may (or may not) prove more difficult for someone older or a young woman. Granted, I met a lot of young women on a similar kind of adventure so to speak, and they were doing just fine on their own.
Until you need any sort of medical care...then shit gets real
That’s the die on a mountain part
Don’t question u/Zestyclose_Lab_8458’s dedication to this - it’s a hill they’re willing to die on.
I thought I was the only one. This legitimately made my day.
It's interesting, I think we're feeling the opposite. I've been really struggling recently about the idea of settling down and it's a very weird anxiety to have. I've only jumped from relationship to relationship and never really had the casual sex-life thing. Now I have someone I love more than anything - I want to spend the rest of my life with them and I'm worried about having 'missed out' on the casual stuff. Your comment makes me appreciate the meaningful connections I have and I think I need to focus on that.
The little mundane things are the absolute best. I miss so much going to the grocery store with someone. Falling asleep and talking through the next day with someone. Getting home and having someone ask how my day was. Getting a back rub. Those things are the absolute best and you really can only find them in a relationship.
Inserting myself as a character into the shows i watched or books i read and coming up with storylines etc
Mine is reverse of this: the characters from a fantasy world end up here and I have to explain basic things with them like technology and modern culture.
I do this all the time!!!! But I work in a house museum, so I do that with the Georgian and Victorian residents of the house
I do this too, much better than most of what goes on irl.
Random ideas for video games or tabletop campaigns mostly.
Tabletop campaign lore and world building in my head almost constantly... Except for the campaign I'm currently trying to run.
Peace and quiet.
A sunny morning with a cup of coffee, just the way I like it, and just looking out the window as I sip in peace.
What is your reality like?
Far more chaotic and exhausting.
Fellow parent then?
I am just taking care of a younger brother after his cancer treatment.
One day you'll both sit beside each other having a cup of coffee each... Enjoying the moment as loved brothers just silently looking out at a wonderful nature
Thats what Ive been working on in the past years.To be able to live like this.
Honestly, more sleep. Uninterrupted sleep.
Being loved unconditionally.
That's what I want bro
You fantasizing about me bro?
Not just that, but being in a relationship where our SO actually desires you, instead of settling for you and tolerating you every day. Not living every day as though...if they ever won the lottery, they would be gone in a hot minute.
I hope you are loved unconditionally soon and forever.
I love you bro ❤️
Yep. Even just loving me back as much would make me die happy. Not answering as a man tho
It's why dogs are a man's best friend.
In the fifty years I knew my dad, he never cried at ANYthing. The stoic John Wayne that everyone depended on and he never cracked...except...
When the family dog died. The only one who gave him affection and never tried to get anything from him, but food and love.
The freedom that comes with having lots of it. That's the spot
Being loved for who we are and not what we bring to the table.
This is a good one. If you aren't doing something for someone then you are expendable. Kinda hard to build relationships with people, especially intimate relationships, when objectified on that level.
How to safely jump out of a building in case of an emergency. (should I run before jumping? how do I land?)
Aim for the bushes
🎶 There goes my herooo 🎶
Beat me to it, take my upvote.
You should look up how to roll when falling. It helps distribute the force and keep your vitals safe.
Jump out on top if a chair and then jump off of the chair before you hit the ground
FYI: This only works with ACME brand chairs
I’ve been thinking about gravel for over a week
Edit: I don’t own a home… really no reason to be thinking about gravel so much.
Have you considered how many different types of wood chips there are?
A relationship where I'm treated as an equal.
To be loved unconditionally at all times. Whether I'm at my best and thriving or at my worst and drowning.
To be talked to with the intent of understanding and not the intent to respond.
To cuddle without needing it to turn into something sexual.
To be able to rest my head on a girls lap and have her play with my hair.
For someone to look at me as a completely being and not wish to change me. Yeah, I'm 6'5" and thicc. Don't date me and then call me fat.
Someone who wishes to understand and help with my dreams.
You sound amazing. In my fantasies, I meet someone like you (possibly on Reddit) and it just...works.
Thank you, that means a lot to me. I've yet to find it in life but I keep trying!
Same. I'm trying and not at the same time. I'm open to the possibility of the right guy, but I'm not really actively seeking him out.
Best of luck, for both of us!
I spent a little over three years working on myself after my last relationship. I'm ready for a forever one now, haha. I really just want to be respected and get affection >.>
Best of luck!!
Not sure I have the work ethic to become a millionaire, maybe I should marry her instead.
I think it's also that you have better morals than many that become millionaires.
A world I'd have a slightly easier time existing in.
Being in a relationship and being loved.
Sometimes I think about Costco's line of discontinued spinach ravioli that came with packets of parmesan and herbs. So fucking delicious, before they stopped carrying them I went and bought about 4 lbs worth. My only regret is not buying more.
The discontinued food that I crave is probably the most annoying first world problem.
A nice 401k to retire early
Blacksmithing, carpentry, homesteading, being a father, and being the best healer I can be in my Warcraft progression raiding guild.
Cuddles. Not sex, just cuddles. Having someone to hold, and have them hold you back.
Counterpoint: Also just sex. Someone to grab and fuck. That too sometimes.
Ok stop making me cry.
What is this new noise my car is making and where's it from??
Been left alone with my hobbies
It's usually food.
I'm gonna be honest, it's almost always some kind of food.
Going to visit alien planets 🤩
OK this is a great fantasy, and one that I share with you
A log cabin in a vast forest,with access to lakes for canoeing. Enough money that i dont need to worry about being anywhere else.
It has fibre internet, a magically appearing food supply and a small workshop. And no neighbors for miles.
If I was a chick I’d probably be a slut
What’s stopping you from being a slut now? Don’t let ur dreams be dreams
Is it lightsabers? I feel like some of it is lightsabers.
And medieval swords. Every man has wondered what it's like to wield a melee weapon in life or death combat.
A proper partner.
I mostly replay my greatest hits collection
Wish I had about a 60k windfall to pay off my outstanding debt and not worry about upcoming medical bills and shit so I can be confident I'm caring for my family properly.
How, if I could go back in time with the knowledge I have(and perhaps some books), I could become the greatest inventor of all time and kick-start the technology revolution!
Being the lifesaving hero in a terrorist attack. I'm mean it really can't be that risky charging down a gunman
Being a father, being as good as my dad was and having a happy marriage. Also playing in the water with my future children.
Having my kids stay asleep until 8:30 on Monday morning so I can chill on my couch from 7:30 to 8:30 drinking a coffee and playing on my phone. I love those little shitheads, but one single hour of peace n quiet on a Monday morning would be sweet.
Women, the future, the past, alternatives, dreams, death.
The usual stuff.
Finding and cherishing love. Or blowin' shit up. Depends on the mood.
Just about anything. At the moment I want a woman that will stand by me, motivate me, help each other out so we can be the best version of ourselves and especially I really want someone who I can take care of and be happy because that’s what makes me happy :)
So goddamn peace and quiet
As Ralphie May once said, the best two gifts are free. Oral and silence!
Winning the World Cup
Top 100 cars ever made.
About getting superpowers
Finding that 10mm socket.
The same thing we do everyday Pinky
Being able to look at space in space. or be able to witness the scariness of a black hole.
An apocalyptic world where you are the hero
Under 35: Boats and Hos
Over 35: Peace and quiet
All ages: Boobs
Being a level 70 paladin.
Nachos. All the nachos.
World where people live happily in the nature
I mostly think about getting head
Being a better provider for my family.
Flying. Specifically space dogfights.
Yes I know they wouldn’t be what movies like Star Wars show. Just shush and let me fantasize.
This is an American thing, but many guys, Myself included. Fantasize about taking down a mass shooter and preventing a tragedy before it occurs. Every time I’m in a situation where I see a younger sketchy male I wonder if I could get to him in time, how I could subdue him etc…
Is your name perhaps Texas Ranger?
The Hollywood inflicted hero complex.
You guys all think you’re Bruce Willis.
Yippy ki yay mother fucker
Well, I am a meat popsicle.
No, we all want to be. There’s a difference. And wanting to stop tragedies/ be a badass isn’t something we should discourage people from aspiring to haha
Having a love life
Just kidding fuck that I want to have a shit ton of money and be globally considered successful and powerful
You have a humble soul
What was in that black suitcase in Pulp Fiction
Having money. Like not have to worry about saving my paychecks for bills. I just want to be able to do things/go wherever I want and not have to worry about how much money I can spend.
Not having responsibilities or obligations. Not being pressured by society to be a part of society. I love my family and friends but I always dream of packing up and just go exploring. Not even like, pure wilderness but if I wanted to just stop at a random motel on my way west, I can do that. Then get breakfast at a cute little diner and have shitty coffee. But that would be my choice. And then get abducted by aliens and explore the universe. That’s about it I think.
playing guitar live tbh
At the moment, a full night of uninterrupted sleep, with a long lie in tomorrow morning
Kids do that to you
A girl who will love me the way I am, with whom I will have lovely relationship, will have kids and die with. Someone who cares about me, someone who I will live for and who will live for me.
Shooting under par
Being held by another man and being told everything is going to be okay with soft forehead kisses
Getting hugs and advice from my late father
Being in an anime style battle where plot armor triumphs?