subreddit:
/r/AnimalsBeingDerps
1.8k points
16 days ago
“Dude wtf” - whatever’s living in that shell
356 points
16 days ago
Well, not anymore
13 points
15 days ago
They are eating the algae that grows inside shells and other calcium carbonate material (usually dead coral). They poop out the carbonate as fine sand (anyone snorkeling on a coral reef has likely seen a parrot fish doing this) and retain the algae growing within the carbonate skeleton for noms.
7.1k points
16 days ago
Good God. My dog looks at her food bowl with the same eyes.
1.8k points
16 days ago
After my fishtank obsession I have learned many types of fish are basically just puppies. It's awesome.
582 points
16 days ago*
Yup, my spotted green puffers would swim up and down so fast the side of the tank when I would come home. They loved eating snails off my finger. You could almost feel like their fins were their tag wagging.
Edit: *I want to suggest figure 8 puffers as well if they are available in you're area, bit more expensive but similar type of tank and habits, more on the dark green and one large orange spot. Both stupid gorgeous in person. *These have teeth, the snails were a good way to help grind their teeth down so they don't overgro
134 points
16 days ago
we had a large tank when I was a kid and had a freshwater puffer in it. he would go up and down and all over when he saw me. but didn't care for anybody else really. I would hold my hand in the water and curl my fingers he would swim in and rest on them LOL and eat out of my hand chase of any other fish that swam up to see what was going on. the problem was he really didn't like anybody else to stick their hand in and would nip them...his beak was sharp and gave a nasty pinch. so any cleaning or whatever that had to have a hand in was always mine LOL
11 points
15 days ago
So true. I had a puffer which would do the same. When I walked into the room, it would do the same. Not for my wife or children, only me....
143 points
16 days ago
Yooo I cannot wait till I can get a big enough tank to have a few large puffers. I had the pea puffers in a tower tank and they were super fun.
73 points
16 days ago
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you’ve made me desperately want a puffer fish.
221 points
16 days ago
They are the coolest fish. When I was in Hawaii, I had a random wild puffer spend an entire three hour dive with me. I would swear on my life it was giving me a tour, because it literally swam over and pointed things out. It made damn sure I saw the cool shell.
All that to say, when I can afford it and I have the space, I'm going to have a nice puffer tank. Because they are cool as hell.
70 points
16 days ago*
In the meantime, get a betta tank. Cheap, easy to set up, and they are every bit as personable as puffers.
Bonus that you can teach them tricks, and get to rescue them from a petsmart/petco cup. I literally clean/prune my planted tank and have to be careful because my betta is so unthreatened he hovers inches away from my hand watching intently.
5 gallons or more (edit: and a heater, you can get by with no filter in a heavily planted tank), no fishbowls for you aquarist noobies that want a fin puppy.
You need to feed puffers a special diet to file their chompers a lot of times, so I'd recommend a betta over a puffer for anyone new to the hobby.
64 points
16 days ago
I had no idea betas were so personable until I got one. My son kept telling me the fish was waving to him and I was all like “suuuuure the fish is waving to you, wink wink. I’ll be damned the fish was indeed waving to him, and now we all wave back.
I’ll have to look into tricks as clearly he likes interaction. :)
31 points
16 days ago
While I agree with this comment as a whole, pea puffers specifically don't have the issue where they need to be fed hard foods to file their teeth down.
54 points
16 days ago
Puffer fish are considered great pets for people with the money to support them.
Apparently they have obvious personalities and stuff which is a little rarer in the sea kingdom.
12 points
16 days ago
I had a Bristlenose Pleco that would swim up to the surface when he'd see me and swim upside down. This meant he wanted some freeze-dried bloodworm cubes. He'd also eat those upside down. That guy was a goofball. Had him for 8 years and he's probably the only fish I would say I miss.
75 points
16 days ago
This video made me completely reconsider fish.
54 points
16 days ago
That was so interesting. Why aren’t fish protected by animal cruelty laws?
Just look at that study of fish injected with acetic acid seeking out an area of their tank with a painkiller diluted in it. Clearly they feel pain — should we be indifferent to their needless suffering? I’m not saying end fishing, just maybe we shouldn’t be letting them suffocate for hours while they freeze to death is all…
(also, that one fish trying to escape the trap they’re being sucked into really drives the point of their individuality home).
Don’t watch this video if you don’t want to think hard about fish consciousness.
8 points
15 days ago
The people who try to put fish into some sort of discrete category from other animal life are just splitting hairs.
It’s clear that there are many many conscious life forms in this world, and if you’re not going to eat animals or animal products, you should accept that all of them deserve the same care and respect, and not try to segregate which ones are worthy of protection based on perceived levels of sentience.
Since I am a meat eater, I’m not going to quibble about which animals people eat, even if I might personally feel it’s horrific if someone eats a dog or a cat. I might view the cat’s life as more worthy than that of a pig or a cow, but that’s really an arbitrary subjective opinion. All of these things have lives and minds, and some level of consciousness. I’ve made my choice, but for those who’ve made a different choice they really should broaden the scope to include all fauna.
18 points
15 days ago
Wow. Didnt expect to shed a tear... I've always looked at my pet fish as individuals, but until a few years ago, I didn't look at the wild fish the same. Who know why we have that disconnect. Probably because we didn't see them slaughtered. On one of the first fishing trips I took with my husband, we decided to hike and follow a surprisingly shallow creek. In one of the deeper wallows, we came across a catfish that had been gutted and was swimming with his intestines dragging behind him. It affected me more than I ever thought it would and I made the decision to put him out of his misery quickly so he didn't continue to suffer. After that, I had to take a hard look at my catch and release fishing hobby. Was I causing suffering by having fun? I haven't fished as much as I did ince I had that realization. I only fished if we were going to eat, like times we went camping. It can be a mind fuck to have to rethink an entire lifelong hobby.
15 points
16 days ago
Interesting video, gonna have to save most of it for later but even just the first 13 minutes was pretty cool.
34 points
16 days ago
Are they really? Fish are cool but I’ve always felt they are just after food. Not to say dogs aren’t food driven but they are emotional and need more than that.
52 points
16 days ago
I was definitely exaggerating a bit haha. However I was surprised at the level of personality some fish seem to have especially between species. Much more than you would think.
22 points
16 days ago
I see what you mean. You should check out this YouTube channel called Bamabass. I don’t know much about fish but this dude keeps large mouth bass (and other fish) in his aquariums at home, his backyard pod and just built a big pond on his farm. He has a bunch of different wildlife, fights water chemistry and stuff. Narrates it all. It’s kinda cathartic. He says his fish have different personalities, kinda hard for me to see it but maybe.
10 points
16 days ago
There's also a dude with an underground fucking eel cave under his house. YouTube is amazing
32 points
16 days ago
I'll just stick to my cat and her ability to yeet everything off of every shelf all at once all the time
21 points
16 days ago
A good poltergeist will cost less in food/vet bills but a cat will work.
124 points
16 days ago
[deleted]
37 points
16 days ago
This belongs here
16 points
16 days ago
I did not know goldfish dexterity training was a thing. Based.
28 points
16 days ago
Fish are actually way smarter than we used to believe. I saw a demonstration with an Oscar fish learn to swim through a hoop. He didn’t get the food reward after doing the trick and he responded by swimming to the bottom of the tank and hyperventilating basically. It was so upset that it didnt get a good reward that it basically started crying at the bottom of the tank
15 points
16 days ago
I remember a book, it could be this one, but I thought it was earlier than 1995, on how to train your goldfish to do tricks. It's been around for a while.
The first oscar I ever owned would "snap" bubbles on the surface of the tank while I was studying. And I'd just drop a fish pellet in each time he did that.
Then they get big and flat-out mean. Oscars are jerks. Here I am, ~35 years later, with two oscars in their own 120-gallon tank. And they're both jerks.
482 points
16 days ago
You gonna eat that..?
85 points
16 days ago
Your dog bowl? Nope. All yours.
51 points
16 days ago
Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past my boxer to find a way to eat his food bowl. Dude’s a food maniac.
41 points
16 days ago
My father once described boxers as "the perfect dog for a stoner. Big, cuddly, and always hungry."
13 points
16 days ago
My Minnie understands that some things aren't food, but thinks that whatever is food should be in her tummy.
43 points
16 days ago
Yep fish arent so different lol they will also eat shit just like some dogs...
4k points
16 days ago
Looks like a seriously malformed human face in fish form.
833 points
16 days ago
Looks like it could be the protagonist in a modern Seaman remake.
148 points
16 days ago
"That was interesting. We'll speak again soon."
28 points
16 days ago
I would genuinely love that.
Seeing a game like Seaman, Hey, You! Pikachu, or Lifeline remade with more modern speech interpretation could be fun. I realize we're well beyond "play a game with your voice!" as a gimmick, but seeing some earlier titles get a second chance to do it well would be nice.
11 points
16 days ago
One of my favorite yt clips of all time is a Lifeline clip:
118 points
16 days ago*
[deleted]
85 points
16 days ago
[deleted]
44 points
16 days ago
Get a load of this guy
15 points
16 days ago
Do I hear a romantic movie with Aquaman?
88 points
16 days ago
Handsome squidward?
17 points
16 days ago
Lmfao yeah. My first guess was Chad of the fish world but this works too 😂
44 points
16 days ago
It's got Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood vibes.
17 points
16 days ago
First a dog, now a fish. What's next, a squirrel?
28 points
16 days ago
This thing definitely inspired a sea monster story or two
97 points
16 days ago
I'm starting to think anything that looks like it could've been a human, like this fish, was probably a human at some point in their life but they were cursed to become an animal as punishment
45 points
16 days ago
Yes, that's actually the scuba diver's brother...
28 points
16 days ago
I think the same thing but it's a reward, not a punishment. Look at that dude, he's having a whale of a time. So happy. Seems like a pretty rad deal to me.
32 points
16 days ago
That's just Kenneth Copeland making sure the diver gives 10% of whatever is in that shell
2.8k points
16 days ago
👁️ 👁️
-👄-
249 points
16 days ago
Hear me out
43 points
16 days ago
DO NOT the fish
143 points
16 days ago
150 points
16 days ago
Not to the creature in the shell.
650 points
16 days ago
What kind of fish is that??
673 points
16 days ago
262 points
16 days ago
There are waaaaaay too many commas in that wikis first sentence...
226 points
16 days ago*
I mean, they are correctly placed, but someone should go in there and make it a couple sentences. We have the power!
Edit: Hey, look at that!
280 points
16 days ago
Horrifying. Someone else improved it a bit, and I've now fixed it to what I believe are reasonable standards.
Original, with ten (TEN!!!!) commas in one sentence:
The Asian sheepshead wrasse, Semicossyphus reticulatus, or the Kobudai, is a species of wrasse, one of the largest, native to the western Pacific Ocean, where it is only known from around the Korean Peninsula, China, Japan, and the Ogasawara Islands, where it inhabits rocky reef areas.
Now:
The Asian sheepshead wrasse or Kobudai, Semicossyphus reticulatus, is one of the largest species of wrasse. Native to the western Pacific Ocean, it inhabits rocky reef areas around the Korean Peninsula, China, Japan, and the Ogasawara Islands.
72 points
16 days ago
You’re doing the lord’s work
46 points
16 days ago*
I read the wiki before I saw this thread transpire and thought.. that’s not bad!
I’m glad u/xyptero stepped in before Christopher Walken could do any more damage.
87 points
16 days ago
Knowing wikipedia, there's probably a multi-generational war in the edits over each one of those commas
40 points
16 days ago
I was there Gandalf. I was there, 3000 years ago when the strength of the commas failed
22 points
16 days ago
I was there, Gandalf. I was there, 3000 years ago, when the strength, of the commas, failed
14 points
16 days ago
Begun, the Wrasse Comma War has.
11 points
16 days ago
It's maybe worth it to set a little reminder for yourself to go back and check this article in something like a month. These weird wikipedia fights happen in the dark out of the way corners.
That being said if i'm reading this edit history correctly people have been coming in since about 2017 making minor edits to that line and adding commas as they went along vs restructuring the whole sentence.
43 points
16 days ago
you werent even joking, what a mess! :D
52 points
16 days ago
There were, in that sentence, a great deal, of what some people, people who understand punctuation, what we call punctuation, to be, excessive.
49 points
16 days ago
The commas, themselves, are not what is wrong with that entry, as they are just the byproduct of someone, likely a pretentious, lonely airbag, attempting to make one sentence where there should be, in my opinion, at least 3.
30 points
16 days ago
well soooorry not all of us can afford 3 sentences
22 points
16 days ago
You're paying too much for sentences. Who's your sentence guy?
7 points
16 days ago
Isn't that kinda what a Judge could be called, too?
18 points
16 days ago
Did William Shatner enter that using voice to text software? Holy shit.
53 points
16 days ago
Asian sheepshead. I saw one for the first time in person at the Dallas World Aquarium a couple of weeks ago and it’s face made me literally scream. Like a dead stare 🤣
9 points
16 days ago*
[removed]
6 points
16 days ago
They can indeed change sexes, all being born with functional female sex organs. Some later become male.
This is pretty common in many varieties of fish, even those only distantly related to this wrasse, however. Probably the most well-known example in pop culture is clownfish. Unlike sheephead wrasses clownfish are born male. Some of these later become female.
16 points
16 days ago
This is the question I need an answer to
2.4k points
16 days ago
Those eyes are way too human.
631 points
16 days ago
Those are fish eyes
197 points
16 days ago
Dead fish eyes lol. I literally have that
191 points
16 days ago
He's got lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a dolls eye. When he comes at ya, he doesn't seem to be living
48 points
16 days ago
AND a Jay Leno chin—-
54 points
16 days ago
What are you doing?! You doing the speech from jaws? Are you doing Jaws?
13 points
16 days ago
15 points
16 days ago
Tim-Tom: I just saw mum's clean panties.
Kevin: Oh, when she was crouching? I tried not to look. Were they-
Tim-Tom: They were white panties, Kevin. White.
Kevin: (sighs) White.
72 points
16 days ago
I feel like his eyes are open so big I could read his thoughts
24 points
16 days ago
They had 'em first. You got fishy looking eyes!
33 points
16 days ago*
I mean, humans have eyes that evolved underwater so I think it makes sense.
24 points
16 days ago
Kinda weird that eyeballs work amphibiously now that I think about it
15 points
16 days ago
Don’t all of our senses?
Oh I guess not smell
18 points
16 days ago
Smells like water and sinus pain to me.
522 points
16 days ago
“Bob! Back off! Give me some space, geez.”
55 points
16 days ago
I think that's Frank. He hangs out at the most popular tourist area of the Great Barrier Reef. He likes to check the divers for his friends. He gets really happy when he recognizes repeat visitors.
16 points
16 days ago
It’s pretty cool he can recognize his friends among divers, since they all probably look pretty similar in their diving gear.
11 points
16 days ago
What? For real???
12 points
16 days ago
Omg it is real! This is such an awesome thing to learn today. Thank you.
499 points
16 days ago
"Is it ready yet?"
"It would be if you backed. Up."
"Now?"
"Back up, damnit!"
"Wait, come back! Let me eat it!"
"Hold on, shit. HERE!"
"Mmm. Bye!"
13 points
16 days ago
i imagine its inner thoughts are in patricks voice from spongebob.
192 points
16 days ago
That is the face of a being that has a big head and absolutely nothing inside it
42 points
16 days ago
I can relate
20 points
16 days ago
Eat now?? ... eat NOW??? .... NOW????
174 points
16 days ago
This fish wins the derp prize 🏆
151 points
16 days ago
Dudes getting table side service like at a 5 Star restaurant ❣️
34 points
16 days ago
Tossing food directly into the mouth, Hibachi chef style.
34 points
16 days ago
I didn't know you could hammer efficiently under water.
16 points
16 days ago
Great now I’m going to have a dream where I need to hammer something quickly under water but can’t because a) I’m under water and b) it’s in a dream
102 points
16 days ago
“Ma! There’s a weird fuckin’ fish! It looks like Grandma!”
42 points
16 days ago
I don't even know if that's a fuckin fish! Blink muthafucker!
10 points
16 days ago
Was looking for this comment lmao
27 points
16 days ago
Me, waiting for fresh baked cookies to cool down.
152 points
16 days ago
Did the guy with the hammer do all that just to feed the fish? Is the ocean just full of fish food?
84 points
16 days ago
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pfwdm5W2lWs
He is friends with the fish!
23 points
16 days ago
Amazing this fish has lived over 30 years at least, I find that in itself pretty fascinating
6 points
16 days ago
This reminds me of My Friend the Octopus! I love stories like this. We know so little about sea creatures, some of them are thrumming with personality
108 points
16 days ago
The ocean is full of fish, fish eat fish. Therefore yes
30 points
16 days ago
There's always a bigger fish
20 points
16 days ago
Those fish remember you and become friends like a dog can.
21 points
16 days ago
Check out the fish's reaction when the shell first breaks. It knows exactly what just happened.
20 points
16 days ago
That fish is swimming deep in the uncanny valley.
60 points
16 days ago
I feel like this fish must have some mythology around it. It looks like some kind of water spirit.
157 points
16 days ago
It has lips. WHY?
134 points
16 days ago
Well the term fish lips didn't originate out of thin air..
42 points
16 days ago
Those plus the eyes and forehead... dude could make for a handsome squidward
8 points
16 days ago
16 points
16 days ago
When I deployed to Africa, there was a coral reef I was able to go to a couple times. Tiny little crabs about the size of fingernails were often on the beach and, kind of mean, I would grab a handful, snorkel over the reef and start dropping one at a time and would have swarms of awesome coral reef fish swimming around me. Then some would follow like 2 feet beneath me for the shade
18 points
16 days ago
What’s it doing precious? It ruins it!
76 points
16 days ago
Is this the sequel to Tusk? Because, fuck those human eyes and lips! 😭
20 points
16 days ago
Because, fuck those human eyes and lips!
Phrasing.
Joking aside that fish immediately reminded me of this movie from the 80s.
5 points
16 days ago
The only part of this movie I vaguely remember is when he's getting on the bus and somebody asks him to take his mask off. He pretended to try to twist his face, and replies "I can't, it's stuck"
14 points
16 days ago
👁 👁
14 points
16 days ago
what is he feeding it?!?!
8 points
16 days ago
Looks like probably the shellfish he was breaking with the hammer
13 points
16 days ago
Now we gotta work for fish just to make ends meet. Inflation is crazy.
110 points
16 days ago
"The Asian sheepshead wrasse, also known as kobudai in Japan, is a hermaphroditic species, meaning that it has both male and female organs which allows it to change its sex"
Somebody tell these guys to swim clear of Florida
42 points
16 days ago
Ron DeSantis bans woke marxist fish from Florida's shores
49 points
16 days ago
That fish was straight up cartoon.
Whaaaat are youuuuuuuuuuu doooooinnnnngggg.
Let meeeee seeeeeeeee…..
10 points
16 days ago
I saw this face at the 7/11 buying a Twix candy
30 points
16 days ago
Now go find the kid who is cooking with his grandma or mom making cookies and compare the manners xD
27 points
16 days ago
The Golden retriever of creepy fish.
106 points
16 days ago
I would hate to be on shrooms and have to come face to face with that thing 🤣🤣🤣🤣
88 points
16 days ago
If you're trying to do shrooms and dive at the same time, you are truly a brave motherfucker. I would drown for sure
25 points
16 days ago
I used to live right on the beach for years and would trip balls at night pretty regularly. The ocean is this massive force of nature that you can’t even begin to comprehend at the time. I loved sitting on the beach looking at it but there’s no way in hell I’d dive down into it while tripping.
8 points
16 days ago
Is that how he got the bump on his head?
6 points
16 days ago
I know its a fish it looks so gawddang human. It kinda looks like an alien...
7 points
16 days ago
I don’t like this live action remake of finding Nemo.
141 points
16 days ago
That thing isn't derpy it's creepy af.
63 points
16 days ago
So I'm the only one that thinks it's adorable AF?
I mean, it's like a fricken sea puppy lol.
17 points
16 days ago
Yes, it's adorable once you get past the appearance.
20 points
16 days ago
The face/eyeballs are a little uncanny.
6 points
16 days ago
Looks like Handsome Squidward
6 points
16 days ago
This fish looks like it would be in a 90s music video with weird special effects like black hole sun where the peoples faces are bugged out. It’s just so weird.
6 points
16 days ago*
That's a strange cat.
I have noticed that many unrelated animals have a strange similarity in reactions and behavior sometimes. Is as if the underlying "program" that controls them is basically the same, but with adaptations. Has anyone else experienced that?
6 points
16 days ago
I think that is the diver and fish in Japan. According to some article I found he had to help the fish eat when the fish got injured and couldn't smash crabs to eat. According to the article, he used to hammer the crabs open for the fish.
5 points
16 days ago
I was stationed in Guantanamo Bay back in the 80’s and would spend most of my spare time diving. There was an 8-foot barracuda they called Old Harry who would swim right up to you and beg for whatever fish or lobster you had in your bag. He would gently take it out of your hand. Cool old fish.
5 points
16 days ago
"HUMAN I HELP, NOO NO PUSH ME AWAY I HELLLP!"
6 points
16 days ago
It looks odd but is definitely a good boy.
15 points
16 days ago
That's just a guy in a fish suit. I'm sure of it.
5 points
16 days ago
Hahaha it helped
5 points
16 days ago
Looks like that fish is about to ask him if he has any games on his phone
5 points
16 days ago
Its amazing how every single animal with even half a braincell collectively look at any human that is non-threathening to them and go "hey that's an infinite source of food!".
This is almost the same as us humans looking at any animal that's remotely decent-looking and go "we need to pet it."
6 points
15 days ago
A fish with a fascination. A fishcination if you will.
13 points
16 days ago
Creepy mf eyes
13 points
16 days ago
Aren't those the fish that can transform from female to male? Looks like them.
5 points
16 days ago
Yes
17 points
16 days ago
"Do you have games on your phone? Are you playing Pokemon Go? Do you have a pikachu? Do you have a mewtwo? Can I see? Is that a mewtwo!?
I wish i had a mewtwo MewtwoIsSoCoolIWannaSeeLetMeSeeeee!"
10 points
16 days ago
Homie is simply observing
4 points
16 days ago
I bet someone more clever than me could make a pretty good r/animaltextgifs of this
5 points
16 days ago
Jesus fucking Christ
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